when the binge is too much
I have addictive tendencies.
I never eat just one chip.
Rarely do I have just one drink.
If I am researching a topic I am interested in I will disappear for hours at a time.
I am either all in or not there at all.
Last month, I decided to escape reality by watching the show, Sex and The City. Has anyone else been totally obsessed with the lives of Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte? It started one snowy Sunday afternoon in January when I was looking to check out on life a little. My brain needed a break. I was craving something familiar. Something light with a side of fluff. Something to mute the world around me. I started at the beginning with the very first episode. My memory was foggy on how the show began so I thought I would just check out one or two episodes. One episode became two, then three and all of a sudden it was dark outside and I had no idea where the time had gone.
I was out of control. I watched while I cooked. I cozied on the sofa every night, phone in hand, disappearing into the glamorous New York City life of four women looking for love in their 30’s. I would hide in my room watching under the covers long after my usual bedtime. I started fantasizing about the show. Wondering would happen next. Even though I had already watched the series in the past and knew know exactly what happened! I found myself watching it like it was my first time.
After about two weeks of this secretive Sex and The City binge-watching lifestyle I was exhausted. I wasn't sleeping well. I couldn't concentrate on anything. My Oura ring that tracks my sleep patterns was screaming warnings about my heart rate recovery and the effects of consecutive nights of little sleep. One evening, I found myself talking about "the girls" to my husband as if they were my real-life friends. It was at that point that I knew I had to cut the cord.
I haven't added up hours lost to my binge but I know it is substantial. After a few weeks of detox from the love lives of my New York City girlfriends I have come to a few conclusions:
TV series are totally addictive. This isn't news but worth noting. I literally did not have an off switch.
Samantha really does have a lot of sex. Like, a shocking amount. (for you non-fans, my apologies)
My body and my sleep patterns rely on a book to prime my brain and body for quality sleep. Not a screen. This was something I already knew but was reinforced in a "Big" way with my recent binge (pun intended).
Brain breaks are a good thing. We all need them. Just make sure you have a way to check back in.
When you start hiding what you are doing from your loved ones you might have a problem.
I want to go to New York City again and wander the streets, get lost in museums and people watch in Central Park. Missing travel so much.
I would break my ankles walking in Carrie Bradshaw's shoes.
I would rather refresh my mind by moving my body instead of sitting on my butt.
For me, the best way to stop doing something is not to start. This applies to TV series and also to chips.
My recent Sex & The City experience got me thinking about addictive behaviour. At what point does it stop being a healthy distraction and start to become something more? In my case, I had an ah-ha moment after only a few weeks. But now, as we go on a year of living in the shadow of pandemic-land, with daily life still muted by cancellations of events outside the home, for many, the binge that started in March of 2020 never stopped.
The pandemic that we have stood witness to over the past year has changed behaviours that will last for generations. In some cases, this is a good thing. We have been forced to step off the hamster wheel of a noisy life and get clear on what is important to us. However, we have also resorted to a variety of coping mechanisms to help fill the void and dull the pain of what we are missing. Binge watching a TV show seems innocent enough until you realize your kids have eaten grilled cheese for dinner three nights in a row just so you can watch the next episode.
Sex & The City is now safely back on the shelf and I am once again reading books before bed. I miss my New York City girlfriends but am content to leave them in the past. Grateful that I was able to cut the cord when I did. Have you found yourself in binge-mode this past year, too?
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