the dinner table
One of my happiest places is sharing a meal with my family. It is a time where we come together, phones are set aside and we all connect. Sometimes we have conversations on serious topics, sometimes we laugh as we remember a fun time together. And, sometimes topics range from a recap of a Family Guy episode or dissecting who our favourite Marvel character is (mine is Captain Marvel all the way!).
We haven't always been as intentional with mealtimes. When the kids were younger they would sit at the kitchen counter and I would basically dole out food as they feasted and ran. It was a gong show. Now that everyone is older, the dinner table has become a space to check in as a family and find connection without distraction.
In the newspaper recently and there was an article interviewing Bob Joseph, the author of "21 Things You May Not Know About the Indian Act". The interview covered a range of topics and, in closing, he was asked to offer advice to Indigenous youth. He reminded youth that the potlatch (feast), a tradition in his culture, was set by those who came before him. He goes on to remind youth that generations of people have been "setting the table" for each of them and that it is important to recognize the people who have helped you get to where you are today. And, to help "set the table" for those still to come.
It made me think about how stories are shared around the dinner table. Stories about our grandparents. Stories about what we were like as young children. War stories. Stories of illness and loss. Stories of families moving to another city or travelling. Stories of fun times and cousin shenanigans. As much as we are a digital generation where events are quickly documented with the snap of a phone camera we still need the commentary that explains the photo. We still need a way to share these stories through the generations. We still need a way to honour those who have walked before us.
For me, the dinner table has served this purpose time and again.
I was reminded of this at a recent dinner at my family cottage. My parents were sharing stories with my own children of my early childhood years. The stories weren't new to me and, in fact, many I had already told my kids. What was new was hearing these stories from my my parents perspective. For me, witnessing the emotion these memories brought up made it feel like I was hearing things for the first time. It was a special and unexpected way to end a meal together. I am grateful for that moment and that my parents are around to share their perspective with my kids.
After a while the same stories can be heard on repeat. This is especially true if there is a new face around the dinner table. A fresh audience! Eyes might roll thinking "here we go again!" but each time I hear something different. Each time I smile. It is a piece of history that, through word of mouth, continues to be passed on from generation to generation.
I rarely recall what we ate but I do remember the stories that were told, topics that were debated and the laughter throughout.
The dinner table is where families, friends and communities come together. It is a place where stories are shared and memories made. I love the idea of "setting the table" to honour generations past and to help future generations moved forward. For as long as I can remember, the dinner table has been an important part of my family life. I am grateful to now carry this on with my own little family.
I would love to know ... what are some of your favourite memories around the dinner table?
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