on motivation … a tale of two closets

A few weeks ago I met a girlfriend for lunch. Instead of sitting down to eat, we decided to shop. I can't remember the last time I shopped with no specific purpose or list. We were trying on clothes in the aisles and giggling like schoolgirls.

It felt lighthearted and free.

At home later that day I opened my closet to put my new clothes away and realized that it was long overdue to be cleaned. I barely wore half of what was in there. That evening, instead of crashing on the sofa and bingeing Netflix, I poured myself a drink, put on some music, and got to work. I went through the shelves and all my hanging clothes. I tried on items I hadn't worn in a while and giggled wondering what I was thinking when I bought that item. I rolled my eyes at the high number of athleisure-style items that had crept into my wardrobe over the past few years.

Does anyone really need more pants with an elastic waist?

Just over an hour later, I had a pile to donate, a few items to toss and had refolded and organized all my clothes. It felt easy. No pressure. A night well spent with a reward at the end.

Contrast my delightful clothing closet experience to another space in my home ...

The third floor of our house has a space that was once a bathroom but is now an "end of the earth" closet. It is truly out of sight, out of mind. We were having some mechanical work done and the closet needed to be emptied. Even though it is located in my son's bedroom I am the guilty party of dumping shit in it, closing the door, and pretending it doesn't exist.

Do you have a space like this in your house?

I had left this project so long it was overwhelming to even start. But I was out of time. On a Saturday afternoon, just before everything was to begin, I found myself a podcast, popped in my AirPods and headed upstairs to get to work. Oh man, there was so much crap. Blankets, random tables, tile samples, all the presentation boards from when I was in design school and unfinished baby books that I had started some seventeen years ago ... you name it, it was all there.

This little four feet by six feet space was filled to the brim and I couldn't even see the floor!

Fighting the urge to give up before I even began, I took a deep breath and started with what was right at the door ... a random Ikea table that needed the legs removed so I could get in and start clearing everything else out. Once the table was out of the closet I could actually stand in the space. Sort of.

"Standing" meant standing on top of old pillows that were flatter than pancakes. Clearly, I had more work to do.

As items were cleared out I put them into one of three piles: Keep, Toss, Donate. I needed a way to organize the chaos and creating simple categories to put stuff in lessens the overwhelm. Truthfully, there wasn't a lot to keep. This should have been obvious since I had avoided this closet like the plague for years.

After a couple of hours of hauling crap up and down the stairs (did I mention this was on the third floor of my house?) I had a big pile to donate, several garbage bags full to toss and was staring teary-eyed at old pictures that I had found. As I stood and admired the now-empty closet I felt a sense of relief that the task was finally done.

I wondered to myself why I had put it off so long ... it had really only been a few hours of work and, with a little effort, I was able to make a big difference.

Two closets. Two very different experiences. One where I was self-motivated and the other where I needed the pressure of an external deadline to get the job done.

Both closets needed to be cleaned out and I felt a sense of accomplishment once both projects were completed. But my motivation was very different for each space.

When I was cleaning out my clothing closet I was motivated to make space after having a delightful experience with a friend. The memory of our time together was top of mind and gave me energy that particular evening. I also see this closet every day when I get dressed and the sense of satisfaction from that short burst of cleaning is the gift that keeps on giving.

The third-floor closet is a space I never use and, to be honest, mostly pretend it doesn't exist. It felt like a chore to clean it out. Something I had to do instead of something I wanted to do like my clothes closet. For the third floor, I needed an external deadline to hold me accountable.

I needed someone else to remind me that cleaning this closet was just one step toward a larger goal.

I can think of many times when I have been self-motivated to get something done and just as many where I have needed to be accountable to others to do the work.

In both examples I felt satisfied once the task was done ... I just needed external motivation to get going for one.

Tell me, what projects are lingering in your world? Is there a way that you can find someone to hold you accountable so you can get started and see the results you want?

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