a birthday letter
I took this selfie while hiking in British Columbia this past summer. In that moment I felt an overwhelming sense of joy and being in the world. I felt truly me.
Writing letters and little notes to myself is something I have done for a number of years. Often my notes occur around my birthday but I have also written letters to myself to work through my feelings, mark the passage of time and to celebrate milestone moments such as when Walking Forward was published.
The content of what I write varies with the season of life I am in. Sometimes it's a congratulatory note. I've written pep talks, shared chronicles of recent events and written love letters. I don't always go back and read what I have written but just sitting down to get my thoughts out is cathartic and helps focus my headspace.
Today, I thought I'd share with you the letter I've written to myself in honour of my upcoming birthday.
Do you write letters to yourself? What would you say? I'd love to know.
Dear Sarah,
Happy Birthday! You turn 39, oops, I mean 39+10 in a few days. It's like you blinked and missed the last decade! Not really. But some days it feels that way.
I wanted to pause on your birthday and remind you of a few things. 49 feels very different from 39. Heck, 49 feels very different from 48! If can you feel that way in just a year imagine what celebrating 50 will be like!
So ... in no particular order here's a wee reminder of a few things that you'll be able to look back on when it feels like life is moving at a snail's pace:
Move your body every single day. Even when you don't want to. You think better, you feel better and you are generally a nicer person when you've gotten the blood flowing. Movement truly is medicine.
Write more handwritten notes. Love notes. Notes to say Hi. Notes to say thinking of you.
When you feel stuck, pause and ask yourself: What do I want myself to know right now, tomorrow and a year from now?
The mountains light you up. Literally. And, yes, hiking always starts uphill. And, yes, occasionally you'll bitch and moan about how hard it is but all the hard is forgotten when you get to the top. Keep climbing the mountains. Do it with people who love you and cheer you on.
Keep meeting your kids where they are at. Advise. Guide. Love. And, let go. You'll always be a Mum, a home, a safe place to land. Letting go is how to love them best.
Seek out deep, connected conversations. It literally lights you up. Put yourself in rooms where it’s happening. Stop hiding.
A walk cures everything. Especially a walk in the woods. Keep walking.
Assume that everyone is doing their best and means well. Even if it doesn’t make sense to you.
When are you finally going to admit that you really do like romantic comedies? Time to own it, Sarah.
Pay attention to how things feel in your body. When you hear something does your chest tighten? That’s a sign. Does your stomach do flips? Also a sign. Is your hip sore? Yup, your body is telling you something. Listen to it. Pause. Get curious.
You love setting challenges for yourself. Go write more books. Go hike more mountains. Don't play small.
Let go of the outcome. Set a direction. Keep moving forward. But if the outcome looks different than what you thought that's okay. When you only focus on the endgame you miss things along the way.
At the end of the day you can only control how you move through this world. You can't control how people treat you and what they do or say.
Energy flows where energy goes. Focus on the good. Focus on the gifts that surround you. Focus on the joy in life.
You are at your best in relationships where there is mutual trust and love.
You've never been good at faking what you think. Don't start now.
Sarah, life keeps getting better and better. Keep walking the path you are on. It will weave in wild and wonderful ways. I promise.
Love,
Me xo